It’s On!

THE Presidential Debate TONIGHT!

The most talked about debate in modern history will air tonight at 9:00 EST. Below is the who, what, where, when & how for the big event tonight.

The question isn’t “how can you watch the debate tonight?” The question is, “how can you NOT watch the debate tonight?” And the answer is, you can’t. The debate will take over every viewing platform, unless you built a Faraday cage planning for this day, you’ll be forced to watch it.

WHAT TIME IS THE PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE?

You will have ninety minutes of commercial-free uninterrupted debating, starting at nine tonight! Well, unless you are in other times zones.

9:00 EST – Eastern Time
8:00 CST – Central Time
7:00 MST – Mountain Time
6:00 ASS – Arizona Screw-Standard Time (ASS)
6:00 PST – Pacific Time
5:00 AKST – Alaska Time
3:00 HST – Hawaii, hope you already asked to get off work early.

WHAT CHANNEL IS IT ON TV?

All of them. Just accept that you will have to watch it if you turn on the TV tonight. The debate will be on all the major television networks & Cable outlets: ABC, CBS, FOX, NBC, PBS, Telemundo, Univision, CNBS, CNN, C-SPAN Fox News, Fox Business, & MSNBC. Even MTV will be talking about it.

“The President is on! He’s on every channel! We’re gonna miss flipper!”

– Comedian Jeff Foxworthy

HOW TO SEE THE DEBATE ONLINE?

Facebook Live (broadcasting ABC’s coverage) and Twitter (showcasing Bloomberg TV’s feed) will both live stream the event. So will all the networks listed above will have an online version, along with Buzzed News, the Daily Caller, the Huffington Post, Hulu, Politico, YouTube,  the Wall Street Journal The New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Politico and Yahoo. (But in all fairness, Yahoo will probably be hacked and highly edited during the 7 second broadcast delay.)

Not a live stream, but Snapchat has even planned a Live Story.

screen-shot-2016-09-26-at-12-43-12-pm

 (Photo credit: MTV.com)

Virtual reality

If the reality of the debate seems to real, and you need to view it through the lens of virtual reality, NBC + Altspace VR plan to launch a virtual reality stream of the debate.

DEBATE MODERATOR?

Lester Holt of NBC Nightly News.

WHO IS DEBATING TONIGHT? 

Clinton and Trump only. Gary Johnson (Libertarian Party),  Jill Stein (Green Party) and Evan McMullin (Independent) don’t meet guidelines to speak – which is more than 3% of Americans knowing your name…. and you have to be at 15 % in recent national polls. Otherwise, frankly, you’re not newsworthy enough and might be a ratings suck, plus it’s more intense with just 2 candidates. Four is a crowd.

WHAT DO THE POLLS SAY?

Who is doing these so-called polls? I’ve never been polled. I think the only reliable polls are exit polls. Polls are a way for the media to drum up drama and deem who is worthy of the most air time. But if you care to be sucked in, Clinton is in the lead.

WHERE WILL THE DEBATE TAKE PLACE?

Both Clinton and Trump are New Yorkers, so it makes sense that it will be held at Hofstra University. Plus, the radical Trump supporters that he has encouraged to shoot Hillary will stick out like a sore thumb in New York, making security threats easier to find for secret service.

WHEN IS THE NEXT DEBATE?

No one really cares, we can’t take much more of this, but apparently there are two more presidential debates scheduled to dramatically drain 90 minutes of your life away from you on Oct. 9th and Oct. 19th. Also a Veep face-off between Clinton’s running mate, Tim Kaine and Trump’s running mate, Mike Pence. Although “Kaine-Pence debate” sounds like an argument about a pharmaceutical drug, this will allegedly be discussion about political policy, or the size of their dicks, hard to say this far in advance.

 

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