Michelle Obama gave an inspiring speech tonight at the DNC.
Rather than give an inspiring speech at the RNC, Melania Trump gave a speech that was inspired by a Michelle Obama speech. And yes, by inspired, I mean totally copied.
I’m sure Melania Trump plans to copy the most recent Flotus speech, as she should, because it was so amazing. So I decided to go ahead and help her with it. So this is free speech. No, really, an actual speech that is free. On the house….
Thank you. Thank you all so much.
You know, it’s already been over eight years since I became an American citizen. I’ll never forget when I saw the Obama girls in a photo on the way to their first day of school. Their faces pressed against the glass. At the time, we were in the middle of a bankruptcy and I thought, “What have we done?” It should be my child in that photo!
That’s when I told Donald to change from the Democratic party to the Republican Party so he could run for President. I can’t wait to wake up every morning in a house built by slaves, and watch my son playing with his dog on the White House lawn.
Because of Donald, our children will never be silly enough to believe that a woman can be president. Because of him, our son will have the balls to be cruel and act like a bully. Our motto is “When they go low, we go lower.” Donald has spent decades doing the thankless work that has put millions in our own personal accounts. When I think about the kind of President that I want, I want the kind that will take care of himself, no matter how it affects anyone else. You can’t have a President that is steady, measured and well-informed.
I know it all won’t be easy. The issues a president faces are not black and white and cannot be boiled down to 140 characters, which is why you should check out our Facebook page and website.
And don’t let anyone tell you that this country doesn’t need to be great again. It does need to be great again. This country is about to become the greatest country on earth. Like P.T. Barnum, we’re giving you the greatest show on earth!